Month: December 2002

Some People STILL Need a Kick To The Head

So with the Premiere of The Two Towers in less than 9 hours from now (for me anyways) the people who’re protesting the title based on events in New York in September 2001 have reared their ugly, neo-puritan heads once more.

Frankly, these people can shove their back-assward heads so far up their asses they can’t see daylight anymore. They really piss me off and not because I’m a Tolkien fan and I feel that it’s blasphemy, but because I’m a writer and a purist of the art form. Art and the expression of that art should NOT have to be changed to fit in with the views of the moral minority (or even the majority). Art, whether controversial or not, should be allowed to be just that, ART! Changing things to fit into someone’s comfy little view of the world so as they don’t have to cope with reality is purest ignorance of the highest order.

I’m soooo against this, in the same way that I get riled up over book burning, book banning, censorship or even someone covering up a statue just because it shows genitalia.

I was going to post a link to the idiots’ website but then realized that they didn’t deserve to get any more attention (or webhits) than they already have. So instead, I bring you the following PVP webcomic that does a pretty good job of summing up the idiocy of these people.

Enjoy

Okay, So I Haven’t Found My Elf Ears Yet…

But I did manage to track down THIS piece of useless minutia about something I know we’ve ALL pondered over at some time or another. Just how big is the stable population of vampires in the fictional town of Sunnydale on the TV show Buffy The Vampire Slayer?

Apparently… It’s 18. But if you don’t believe me, just check the link above and be dazzled by the higher math geekage of a Buffy Fan with a PhD.

And now… Back to Elf Ear Hunting…. *ponders* Hrrmm. I wonder if that’s a sequel to Good Will Hunting?

I’ve got A Ticket To Ride…

Let the rejoicing commence… at 1pm MST, on Wednesday, December 18^th, I shall be watching dreams become reality. Yup that’s right. I’ve got a ticket in my hot little hand for the matinee showing of Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers. Sure, there are earlier shows, like the 12:01am show the night before. But I’m old now and would probably fall asleep on the way home. I’m happy enough to see it on opening day at a decent hour.

Besides, at 1 pm I most likely won’t have to put up with a) young teenagers who need a kick to the head rather than another staple – errr… I mean piercing – and are only LoTR fans because it’s the “in” thing currently and b) All the rabid fanboy freaks and weirdos who’ll be dressed up as that pervy hobbit fancier Legolas (and his less beautiful companions). It should be fun. I’ll write all about it and spoil everything come Wednesday night…. or probably just end up bitching about this “compact between elves and men that has apparently been broken” (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you fall into category A above, staples or not).

Anyways… in other, less Middle-Earthy, news, it’s been awhile since we’ve had a decent quiz around here, so I in honour of something else that will be released on Wednesday, I bring you a quiz from one of my many other addictions: The Sims. Or in this case The Sims Online.

Enjoy

*wanders off trying to remember where he put his elf ears*

The Countdown Continues…

Ya know… having a mother-in-law isn’t that bad after all. *knocks on wood*, Especially when you have one that gets you the extended DVD box set of The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship of The Ring with the nifty Pillars of Argonath Bookends for your birthday.

30 Extra minutes of Middle-Earth Goodness plus a whole shwack of appendices and behind the scenes footage. I’m still drooling!

And after only watching it once (and a little bit of the cast commentary version) I’ve got to say that this is the way the movie should have been in the theatres the first go round. Nothing weird or wacky was added (at least no more than what was originally changed *cough*Arwen*cough*), just key scenes here and there were expanded upon, reworked slightly or added to where they were missing.

Yes, that means there are still no Old Man Willow or Tom Bombadil scenes, but we now have a full scene explaining the gifts that Galadriel gave each member of the fellowship instead of just what we saw her give Frodo in the regular version.

The movie is tighter and, I feel, truer to the book with these slight tweaks. Peter Jackson is a man with amazing vision and I think he would have easily overcome Tolkien’s belief that his world could never properly be adapted to the silver screen. And I think he has done so with an amazing clarity of purpose and focus on detail.

I won’t say more because it’s late and I must rest up before tomorrow when I am going to see if I can preorder some Two Towers Tickets for next Wednesday afternoon (perhaps a bit late, but I’m up for the challenge nonetheless).

And speaking of the Two Towers, I finally got around to tweaking the countdown timer. It now works properly.

You can go HERE and wait with baited breath like the rest of us fanboys.

And if anyone knows of a site that has a good parchment-esque version of Tolkien’s original Middle Earth map in jpeg format, please let me know. I’d like to use it as a background for that page.

I Wish…

So my writing spurt stopped abruptly about five minutes after I wrote about it last night. Didn’t get very far either. Damn dirty apes…. errr…. uhm… nevermind.

Anyways, here’s a stupid little list that would be cool if it were true.

The Top 10 Things That Would Be Different If Santa Were A Science Fiction Geek

10.) You asked for a train set, but got George Takei’s makeup towel from “Wrath of Khan” instead.

9.) Changes into a jolly red goo to easily slide down chimneys.

8.) “And I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight, ‘Reconfigure the deflector array, and make the jump to light!'”

7.) Attack of the Clones would still suck. (Some things even Santa can’t change.)

6.) All the little boys (and some girls too) would be getting anatomically correct Xena dolls for Christmas.

5.) No toys, but children all over the world get an e-mail explaining 47 reasons why the trip is scientifically impossible.

4.) Cloned copies in malls across the country. Sleigh travels faster than light. What do you mean “if”?

3.) “Naughty/Nice” list replaced with a “Kirk/Picard” list.

2.) Christmas would have 36 minutes of never before seen footage.

and the Number 1 Thing That Would Be Different If Santa Were a Science Fiction Geek…

1.) For starters, he’d never go out on a mission dressed in red.

Random Scribblings

I’ve currently got a random Shadowrun-ish/Cyberpunky story bouncing around in my head, trying to get out. I’m scribbling like mad to at least get the gist of it down before the Muses toss me aside like a cheap sex doll with a puncture.

Anyways… Back to writing.

In Other News…

It’s only been four hours and I already miss my wife.

Long distance relationships that are made even longer due to the bureaucratic bullshit and inefficiency of the US Immigration *cough*Service*cough* suck monkey nuts.

Bored? Drive This Guy Crazy

Heh. Once again, those hard working folks that make up my intrepid research staff (publically this gestalt entity goes by the name of David) have found yet another pointless site to amuse and befuddle you all.

So, you’re bored of endless porn sites and mindless drivel about the state of affairs in Outer Mongolia? Why not take the time out of your busy schedule to annoy the hell out of someone via the internet.

Nope. It’s not spam. That is verboten and is a castrating offence in most countries! It’s just home automation gone awry. Some idiot in Texas has set up a website with interactive home automation controls where YOU get to turn his lights, and various appliances, etc. on and off.

And no… it doesn’t surprise me that the twit is from Plano either. (For those playing along at home and have no clue what I’m talking about, Plano is roughly the red-headed step-child of the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex).

Anyways, if you want to some time playing with this guy’s stuff the link is Here

Rantings From The Soapbox

Can I hear an AMEN BROTHA!!! Thanks once again to my buddy David for being bored out of his gourd at work and passing this stuff along.

Soap Box

Geek Alert!!!

This dude has waaaaaaaaaaay too much time on his hands if you ask me. Still it’s tres cool nonetheless. And of course it’s made of Lego, so by definition, it is both cool and a masterpiece of art.

’nuff said.