Ummm…. Okay?!?!?!?

So really, can anyone here tell me what a 2000 year old (give or take) dead guy smells like? Apparently these people know.

Honestly, what will they think of next? You humans baffle me so much sometimes that I am sorely tempted to phone up my editor at The Guide and see if my expense account has enough in it to deliver 7 or 8 thousand bugblatter beasts from Traal just to see what you’d do with them.

Hang on… Frankie mouse wants to have a word with me.

*bzzzzzzzzt* <<<<Transmission Ends>>>>

And Now You Know…

*Cue NBC’s The More you Know Music*

I found this while surfing around tonight. It’s stupid and it’s funny so I thought I’d share.

(Just reload the browser window to learn more)

Some of the more amusingly stupid ones that I’ve come up with so far are:

In 1972 Vin Diesel was sent to prison by a military court for a crime he didn’t commit. He promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, he survives as a soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find him, maybe you can hire…. Vin Diesel.

Vin Diesel once used Gary Coleman as a hand puppet. Coleman said the experience changed his life and led him to give up smoking.

Vin Diesel has spent thousands of hours and a personal fortune trying to convince the band Ramstein to do a cover of ‘Broken Wings’ by Mr. Mister.

Vin Diesel challenged Jesus to a race across the Atlantic and would have won had he not been eaten by a giant whale. After he murdered it to death from the inside, he emerged in the South Pacific and found the island from Lost, and rescued everybody.

He is made up of smaller, slightly more British Vin Diesels